The Cyber Why: What We Read This Week...
... and why you should too! (1/11/24)
We’re baaaaack! CES brings us a slew of new AI-powered gadgets, including “The Rabbit" (nope, it’s not like that one), unicorns now start at 3B$++, Carta steps in it big time and has to leave an entire market behind, and we make crude jokes about steaks in and nuggets out. All this and more on this week’s edition of The Cyber Why!
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CES - RICK COVERAGE
Best of CES 2024: The 23 top gadgets (Tom’s Guide)
The Best of CES 2024: What We’re Looking Forward to Most (Wirecutter)
AI Is Everywhere at CES 2024 (CNET)
(Rick Pick) Based on the number of smart gadgets coming out of this year's Consumer Electronics Show, we are going to run out of IPv4 addresses on our home networks and will need to run IPv6. Everything, and I mean all the things, are "smart" and "AI-ified" now. From transparent OLED TVs to AI mirror mirrors on the wall, to housekeeping AI bots straight outta The Jetsons, the future is here. You can even get an Anti-Snore Smart Pillow. I preordered a Rabbit R1, a dedicated personal assistant powered by AI. Tyler bluntly told me I won't even use it, he is probably right. I see all these new gadgets and think about all the new attack surfaces - but I still have to have em! - Tyler’s note: My wife said I must buy the anti-snore smart pillow, DAMNIT!
Carta Exits Liquidity Market After SNAFU!
Carta, the cap table management outfit, is accused of unethical tactics by a prominent startup (TechCrunch)
Original LinkedIn post from Linear CEO (Karri Saarinen - Linear CEO)
How We Handle Cap Table Information (Henry Ward - Carta CEO)
Carta exiting startup stock sale business (Axios)
Carta stepped in it this time. There appears to have been a failing of the proverbial firewall between the Carta cap table management business and the CartaX private stock liquidity business. A CEO from one of Carta’s customers found out the hard way that Carta is not doing a great job of keeping cap table information away from the side of the business that looks to peddle private companies’ shares between investors. When I first heard about the story, I incorrectly assumed that the CartaX employee must have found out who held the private stock of the target company through a public disclosure somewhere - it turns out I was completely wrong. After researching the incident and digging into the details, the Carta CEO straight up admitted that an internal employee broke the rules and that three companies were affected in this manner. After additional complaining and bickering from rightfully pissed-off customers, the Carta CEO threw in the towel and shut down the entire CartaX business, saying that it was not worth the risk to his primary business. You can read the entire LinkedIn threat that kicked off this debacle here.
The New Definition of Unicorn - $3B++
Dry January: The Sobering State of Public Markets for Cybersecurity Companies (Strategy of Security)
Tech Market Breakdown (This Week In Startups)
Cybersecurity unicorns are having a truly “sobering” moment. Many of them have a limited path to IPO, placing them squarely in Zombi(corn)land. This research and commentary by Strategy of Security dives into the complete funnel of cyber unicorns, noting that those that are valued in the $1B to $2B range likely have little to no chance of clearing through the log jam of over 100 cyber unicorns ready to IPO anytime soon. There are roughly 113 cyber unicorns today, with 70.7% (80) of those squarely located in the area of a slow and painful death. You have to show a very clear path to $3B in valuation or more to consider going IPO today — 100 M USED to be the IPO ARR level. Now, you need closer to 1B ARR to consider going out. Oh, how the times have changed.
Microsoft Tear Down and Build Up
How Microsoft Security Succeeds (Frank Wang)
How Microsoft Struggles With Security (Frank Wang - Paywall)
Frank Wang is a top-end analyst and writes the really interesting substack Frankly Speaking. He frequently writes articles describing the chances of success for a specific company within the cybersecurity market. This week, he wrote both a teardown and a build-up of how Microsoft could either win or fail in its efforts around cyber. While I appreciated the analysis in both pieces, the success article was the one that really hit home. Microsoft can win in cyber by leveraging three particular points:
Change the GitHub security offering and build from there
Double down on IT security through acquisitions
Focus on the identity market with Microsoft AD
The only problem is that if you read the other article, you will realize that they can’t possibly win. They have no ability to execute and no leadership to drive them there. Sorry, Microsoft, the path lay before you, and you are deemed unworthy!
A $3,500 "AI Powered Grill" at CES?
A $3,500 Toaster for Steak: The Wild AI Perfecta Grill Promises Sizzling Meat in 2 Minutes (CNET)
The Guide to Grilling & BBQ Tech at CES 2024 (The Spoon)
(Rick Pick) As The Cyber Why's Chief BBQ Officer, I feel compelled to cover some emerging tech from this week's Consumer Electronics Show. The "future" of grilling is here, and for just $3,500 ($1,000 discount available if you act now), you too can be a part of it. The world's first AI-powered grill, Perfecta™ (your personal AI-Chef), uses NeuralFire® Technology, AI algorithms, and smart sensors to deliver the perfect steak in 90 seconds. For someone who spends way too much on BBQ and cooking rigs, I'm not going to lie, I'm interested. The price puts you in the upper range of high-end pellet smokers. The Perfecta™ would complement my existing rigs, not replace them. I'm still a fan of reverse searing a steak on a smoker and a griddle while drinking a cold one by the pool.
Editors Note: Also along the lines of funny IoT stories is this little “nugget” — Kohler’s new smart bidet adds voice control (The Verge). That’s just what I need to say each morning “Hey toilet - please wash my ass!” After a big steak, this could be the perfect complement to the Perfecta.
Quick Hits and Hidden Gems
Apple Vision Pro goes on sale Feb 2 for $3,500 (TechCrunch) - No way I pay 3.5K$ when the Oculus costs a fraction of that. I’d rather have a GRILL! (Trolls will dredge this up in 3 years when this device is ubiquitous and sold out all over the world, I’m sure)
DoJ Charges 19 Worldwide in $68 Million xDedic Dark Web Marketplace Fraud (The Hacker News) - The game of whack-a-mole continues. 19 more people busted, and 19 more will pop up next week. Keep on fighting the good fight!
Why Is Everyone So Unhappy at Work Right Now? (WSJ) - What drives people to work? This article argues it’s a sense of purpose. Are they right? I think so!
Elon Musk blames SEC for fake Bitcoin tweet blunder (Yahoo) - On Tuesday, the SEC's Twitter account was compromised, announcing it had approved a BTC ETF. Turns out someone didn't have MFA enabled. Oopsie!
AI & Cyber from a Detection Engineer’s Perspective: Explainability Matters and Context is King (CyberBuilders) - Because, of course, context is king!
What Does Marc Andreessen Look For In Startup Founders? (LinkedIn) - It’s called an “idea maze.” His voice at 1.25x on the video is an “idea maze” to me!
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